Welcome, new year!

I apologize for it being quite some time since my last post! I know you're all on the edges of your seats to know how things are going in the midwest! I have no excuse but to update you all today because it's the second of perhaps a week of snow days! We had a blizzard all day yesterday-- it NEVER stopped snowing, ALL DAY! I have never seen so much snow in my life! The forecast for today is 1 degree and windy with a chill in the negatives. It is beautiful so quiet and white outside and I can't wait to cardboard-sled and make cavernous snow piles with my roommates! How often do we get so much work off all together!?

I went home for Christmas break and saw a new member of the family- Bear Victor Runberg (who is truly a cuddly, hungry bear!) and friends and fam I love most, many whom I was deprived of talking for months! I had some much needed heart to hearts and times of real honest open reflection. It is funny how you don't realize how different the world can be depending on who you are surrounded by and where you're located...even if it's in the same country! There's nothing like close friends who have known you forever to put you up to a mirror and see how you've grown and what you've learned. I've basically learned that God is GOOD and I need Him for each breath I take for survival because I cannot be trusted with my own life as much as I want to think I can be... what a silly idea! I have thought that for far too long even if I would not have admitted to it! God is the constant anchor in my life no matter what changes life brings, and that gives me so much peace. I'm just learning to allow God to embrace me. Why is that so hard!? My goals for this year are to trust God more fully, to live with less fear... and to hug more often!

Before Christmas, life really consisted of more salsa dancing, a late night trip to St. Louis (where we met some other incredible MVSers!), dinners at new friend's houses, playing music (I'm great at the shaker it turns out : ) going to holiday parties, having craft nights, and watching my new friendships here grow and change. I am so thankful for the community I have here of housemates, church members, and coworkers. But it's VERY different from any community I have ever been in. It's great to be sharpened by people of a different material. That sounds wierd but I think it describes how it feels well! It is a Christian community unlike the ones I am used to. It's already opened up my mind and heart, and it's just fun. It is good to know that God has spoken to me and I can trust what He has spoken to me and live into who God has made me to be fully- with all my seemingly conservative quirks and all : ) I will stand by what I know to be truth and hold to it closely while letting it be refined and tested. It's so good and necessary!

Work has been great- it was actually a lot of shopping and wrapping for Christmas. AYS tries to give each of it's clients gifts for the holidays- which is probably 200 kids and families. The best part was getting to call some of the people I case manage for emergency utilities and rent and offering them gifts from the 'adopt a family' program. These families have nothing, but get to take massive piles of presents home for their kids and themselves for Chrismtas. This, however, has mixed outcomes. One company took so many pictures of each client handing the unsuspecting receiver each gift, and reading about their 'charitable works' to this mom of four who has been on unemployment for months and is barely keeping her head above water. This woman was their 'charity' and they felt great about it- what about this mom? But earlier that day as Karen and I piled presents into the car of another mom with 4 children, she found it hard to carry a conversation because she was getting so choked up. In the end, we hugged her and told her she deserves far more than this and she just started balling. If giving is to truly benefit, it's gotta be about the person who gains, not the one who gives. We all need help and should not be afraid to ask for it. Thank you Jesus for your goodness to us needy people in every way! Home ties is going through some much needed staff changes, and I think rules are going to be more strictly abided to- which will help me out immensely! I am learning to stand my ground, and not put all of my trust in the goodwill of kids who have been denied about any reason to trust others given their short life histories. It will be a slow process of having a meaningful relationship with these guys!

I miss everyone at home! It's always tough going back after having you all back again in my life for two weeks! Please respond to me as soon as you can and tell me about what's going on with you!!! Really, right NOW- GO!!!